what a mess i've made

i think i've been stuck here in kentuky for far too long. i had dreams, no all that long ago, either. i have no real ties to anywhere and i am not dead, so there is nothing holding me back.
i think it is about time to head on the road again. chase down some dreams, again. live a little, again.
it has been such a long, long time since i have felt like i had any real control of my life. i need to get that back. fear is the only thing that has kept me here. fear of what is out there. fear of what is not going to be there.
but, shit, there are oppertunities and adventures around every bend. and heaven knows my will is strong. i can go anywhere and do anything. there is no one to stop me, but me.
i am so unhappy here. i need to leave soon. september, i think.
wish me luck. i need a place to live and a job.... i'm thinking california. fresh start, here i come!